should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
