Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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