Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
