do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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