What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
