It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
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We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
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I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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