Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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