I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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