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he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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