you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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