your parents love me but you hate me
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
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