you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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