just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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