Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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