dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight