Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
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Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
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Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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