I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Randomize
