ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
