It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
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