Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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