I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
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