My boss' voice literally gives me gas
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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