Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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