i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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