I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
NoShamevember. You game?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
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