Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize