ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize