He is an equal opportunity slut.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
