she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize