lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
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