Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
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