After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize