That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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