My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
FUCK WHALES
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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