Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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