Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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