oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
farters have to be the big spoon...
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
