you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
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oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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