I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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