How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize