On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
