hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
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