So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize