Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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