At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I showed him my bush... on skype.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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