We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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