Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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