You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
