So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize