Your dad touched me again.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
