went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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