It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
